Frustrated!

Here I am at 8.5 months after surgery and I am in a huge stall that is driving me crazy. Want to know exactly why it is driving me crazy?? I can't get below 200 lbs! Grrrrrrrrr!

I have gone as low as 201 lbs then bounce back up to 204 or even 207 lbs before coming back down a bit but never below 200 lbs! I want so bad to be in Onderland before my 40th birthday which is the end of this month (April 27).

I am hoping this isn't the end of the line. That my weight loss has stopped. I feel great, feel thin but I still see myself as fat when I see pics of myself, even when others tell me I look great....

I tried the 5 day pouch test but ended up not finishing it. Lost a couple of pounds then back up they went. I don't get it! I know I've been eating more carbs which is bad but it still shouldn't stop my weight loss!

Sometimes I wonder if I am just destined to fail....

My post on OH about losing 100 lbs

I just wanted to add to my last post I made about losing 100 lbs in 6 months from surgery. I am pasting the post I made on obesityhelp.com so you can see all the wow moments I have had in the past 6 months.....

*I can't believe it!! It's been an awesome past 6 months since my surgery but this whole time I couldn't wait to hit that 100 lbs lost point and now I've done it! I had just called my mom and was laughing about how I was .8 lbs away and seemed to be losing ounces not lbs to get there. Then I went to get in the shower and got on the scale and there it was! I almost screamed lol. I am 208.6 lbs now, down from 308.6 lbs only 6 months ago.

The last time I was down this much was 10 years ago this month when I had my back surgery and needed to lose 20 lbs for that surgery. Now my next big goal will be to get below 200 lbs and I want to reach that before I turn 40 on April 27th. I think I will get there no problem lol. I haven't been below 200 lbs for 16 years!

There have been frustrating stalls along the way but I've learned to get along with those stalls lol. I know my body is readjusting with each stall and I still lose inches or I can almost see the weight getting redistributed all over. I feel alive again and so full of energy!

I wanted to list some of my "WOW!" moments that I've experienced in the past six months so sorry if this post gets a bit long lol.....

- I can now fit into the bathtub to take my beloved bubble baths without getting stuck or wedged, I actually have room around me now and my butt bones hurt on the hard bottom lol

- I can shave my legs without having to turn myself into a pretzel, almost drowning myself in the tub

- I can see certain body parts that I had almost forgotten were there lol

- I can cross my legs, not just putting my ankle across my knee but actually cross them fully! I don't have to grab my leg and pull it up to do it either lol AND I can cross them both ways, not just one leg, I can switch legs with ease lol

- I can walk through the mall or park near the back of a parking lot and not be out of breath walking. I can walk quite a distance and not get tired or need rests. I even run!!

- Sex is better than ever!!!

- I have boobs again lol! Before they sat on my big old tummy but now...DAMN they look good and perky still lol, maybe not as firm but I haven't lost anything there so far, still a 44D lol and my bf keeps reminding me how good they look lol

- I showed my kids that I can still do the splits, couldn't do that a few months ago

- I am so full of energy I have a hard time sleeping at night now, I wake up after sleeping a few hours and I am raring to go

- I am always cold now as opposed to always hot

- Very little loose skin so far!

- I am in a size 16 pants and large top, I don't shop at Pennington's anymore but I picked up some tight size large rock t-shirts and they look good on me!

- My butt looks awesome again (back in school days I was voted by the guys as having the best butt in school lol)

- I can paint my toenails with ease!

- I actually like to exercise!

- I don't dump so I still get to eat whatever I want BUT my tastes have changed so that chocolate and pop and other bad, sugary foods don't appeal to me like they used to

- I can eat almost a whole cheeseburger from a fast food restaurant although I have to do it slowly lol

- I feel sexy and desirable again

- I get checked out by men again

- people hold doors open for me or strike up convos with me again, I'm not "invisible" anymore

- My shoes are now too big for me, as is my jewellery and hats

- I can sleep on my tummy

- sleeping on my back I don't get choked by neck fat or cleavage now

- I can fit, with room to spare, through turnstiles

- I can work long shifts and not have sore feet from standing so long

- I can squeeze by people in tight spaces and not hit them with my tummy or butt lol

- I can fit in theatre seats!

- All seat belts fit around me now

- I don't need help putting on socks and shoes anymore!

- numbness in thigh due to back injury and surgery 10 years ago is now gone!

- my back doesn't hurt hardly at all anymore (bad back and disk removed)

- my self confidence is sky-high!

I am sure there are so many more that I can think of if I try really hard but I don't want this post getting too long lol.

Anyways, thank you so much to all of you for your support and inspiration and to all my friends at the Windsor Weight Loss Surgery Support Group. I can't wait to hit my next goal and finally my end goal. I feel it's so within reach now that I can definitely do it!

Finally..................I LOVE MY RNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *

In The Century Club! 100 LBS Gone Forever!!

Well, it has been 6.5 months since I had my RNY gastric bypass surgery and as of today I have lost 100 lbs!!!!! I am so psyched!!

I can't believe how good I feel, how sexy I feel and how free I feel! I can do so much more than I have in years and I feel alive for the first time in at least 10 years!

I don't feel that I have given up a whole lot. I don't "dump" from eating sugar or fats and when I do eat those things I find I actually lose more lol. I can eat somewhat normally, not having my portions restricted too much. Of course I can't eat 2nd or third portions anymore and eat probably half to 2/3 of a real portion but I don't feel like I am deprived at all.

I can't believe I've lost 100 lbs in 6 months and hit my first big goal. My next goal I wanted to reach by my birthday on April 27, 2009...which is to be below 200 lbs. I am 208.6 as of today so I think I will reach that goal no problem!

Sick of Plateaus

Well, it's getting closer to Valentine's Day and I'm not sure my little goal will be met. I am in another plateau! I was down to 215 lbs and went up to 220 for a day or two and am now back down to 217 lbs. I can't seem to get back down to 215 lbs and I have been eating right. I know it's water weight cuz I've been feeling bloated but man is it ever frustrating!

I am worried now. First I am worried that I won't lose 100 lbs for my Valentine's goal which should have been easy to do. Next I am worried that I won't get to Onderland by my birthday in April.

Sometimes these plateaus don't worry me much but this one has me worried. The last time I was this weight was when I got pregnant for my youngest child and I had been this weight for a while. I'm just concerned that my body will want to stay at this weight....forever....

I lost the first 70 lbs so easily, then it all slowed down. I know I can now eat more than a few months ago but still not enough to gain weight...

I can't wait for winter to be over so I can get out more and get more active! That will help me lose more!!

New mini goal

I am really hoping to be down to 199 lbs or "Onderland" by my 40th birthday which is April 27th of this year. I am freaking out a bit that I won't get there but I have decided to make myself a mini goal in the meantime.

I want to have lost 100 lbs by Valentine's Day. I have lost 89 lbs as of today so that would be 11 lbs to lose in a month...seems attainable right? Well, I hope it is cuz my weight loss is so weird lately!

I will be on a stall for a while, then gain a pound or two then all of a sudden BOOM! I lose anywhere from 1-10 lbs suddenly lol.

I admit that I don't follow what I am supposed to eat religiously, nor do I exercise like I should but it also seems that when I cheat a bit with a forbidden food I seem to lose.....weird!

Anyways, let's see if I happen to get down 11 more pounds in the next month. If I can do that then I am so close to hitting Onderland by my birthday!!

Christmas Goal

Ok, I know it's after Christmas now but I had to post what's going on with a goal I had set. I had wanted to be down to 225 lbs by Christmas and was stuck at about 228 lbs for a few weeks. I got within a 1/2 lb of that goal as of Christmas day.

Today however, I got on the scale and was 222.4 lbs! That means in the past week I have lost 6 lbs! I am so exicted about this! I was sick yesterday, I think I had a touch of the flu and was in the bathroom a few times with the runs (TMI I know lol) but I don't think that accounts for all the weight loss. I have also been more active and Chris got me a leg machine to work out with for Christmas so I was using that a bit too. I've also been eating more, not all bad foods but I normally don't eat enough which is probably why my weight loss slows down. I've had some sweets but not many so I am surprised still to have lost that much!

I am 12 lbs away from hitting the century club, which means I will have lost 100 lbs! I am also close to Onderland, being below 200 lbs! I haven't been there in about 16 years!!

I am so excited to have lost weight through the holidays for once, instead of gaining lol. I love my RNY!

Hair Loss

Wow, it's been almost a month since I've posted a blog! Bad me!!

Anyways, in that time I started to notice that a bit of my hair was "shedding", kinda like the amount of hair you tend to lose after having a baby. I wasn't concerned. THEN, one day I am in the shower and noticed my hands were covered in hair! Gobs of it!! I didn't really panic but I did think, ok here we go....

I knew that there was a possibility of losing some hair. It's a much talked about subject after weight loss surgery. I think it's the combination of the anesthetic from surgery and the rapid weight loss. At any rate, you can lose hair and a lot of it. One of the reasons you need to be diligent with taking protein supplements is that it is supposed to help prevent hair loss.

I started to get a bit lax in taking my protein shakes. I was supposed to take two a day and I was lucky if I got one in, then it was down to 2-3 per week. Well, that's when the hair started to go.

I didn't panic though. I had hoped and thought I'd be one of the lucky ones who didn't experience this but I was. I had had surgeries before and never had hair loss. Anyways, I just thought I'd ride it out.

Well, after clogging the drains many times and getting sick and tired of having to try and get all the lost hairs off my hands when I shampooed, I decided to do something about it. I went to my good friends on obesityhelp.com and asked them for their advice. One of the girls there who lives in Windsor and goes to my support group responded with what our surgeon suggested (we have the same surgeon also). He suggests a vitamin called Maxi-Hair that I guess you can only get in the states.

Last week my mom had to cross the border with my grandma so she offered to pick me up some. She managed to find some for me, talk about horse pills!! Now, we are not supposed to swallow anything bigger than an M&M so I cut the first one in half and it was still hard to swallow. I am not big on taking pills lol. After that first one I got lazy and didn`t cut them but man, if you swallow them wrong...it hurts going down sideways!

So, it`s been a week now since I started taking them. They are good for hair growth, nails and skin. So far I have noticed my skin is getting better. I usually have eczema on my hands pretty bad in the winter and it`s all cleared up! I think the hair loss has slowed down a bit but I am also not taking my protein shakes like I should be. I am just so tired of them. I think I am going to try some more protein bars instead of the shakes.

I`m glad I have a lot of hair so the loss is not noticeable to anyone but me. If I run my hands through my hair I can see a ton of lost hairs on them after pulling them away and my hair feels thinned out. I have always had very healthy hair, even though I dye it, and now it`s breaking and I have split ends, yuck!

Hopefully things get better from here on out. On the up side, I have now lost 80 lbs in 4.5 months and am past the halfway to goal mark! I tried on some jeans the other day, size 18 and they not only fit but they are a tad bit on the loose side! From a size 26 to 18 in 4 months! I also bought a large shirt, no more 5X`s!! I love the compliments I get now lol. I am 3 lbs away from the goal I wanted to hit by Christmas. I am loving my RNY and so proud of myself! Go me!!