Saturday, September 27, 2008

8 Weeks Gone!

Well it's been 8 weeks now since my surgery and I've lost 50 lbs but the weight loss seems to have slowed right down. I'm not too worried but it is discouraging all the same. I know my body has to adjust and to lose 50 lbs in two months is amazing! I feel so good and am looking a lot better.

The eating is getting a bit better too. Tonight I was able to eat a whole taco! That is so awesome! Usually I take two to three bites of something and am so full but tonight I ate a whole taco, slowly but with no problem!

I also tried on some old clothes that either I had outgrown or were too tight and they fit! Some fit good while others are loose lol. It's so amazing to try on clothes and have them be loose instead of too tight! I still don't want to post any pics until I feel it is really noticeable. Hopefully soon.

Anyways, I've lost 50 lbs now and have about 119 lbs to go until I reach my goal. It seems a lot but I know I can do it and I will!

Saturday, September 20, 2008


Lately I have been discouraged about not being able to eat more than a couple of bites still. I had gotten to the point where I was back to just fluids, soup, shakes because it didn't seem worth it to make anything to eat if I was going to just take two bites of it.

Well today I am so, so close to reaching the first big goal I set for myself. Originally I had about 160 lbs to lose so I decided my goals would be in 50 lbs increments. I got on the scale today and have lost 49.4 lbs which is so close to that 50 lb mark but I let out a little squeal of delight lol. I started off at 308 lbs and am now 259 lbs (amazing to be in the 250's now!). Also, my bf keeps calling me "flat ass" now lol, I tell him it's just cuz all my clothes are hanging on me but he keeps teasing me. I am afraid to try on smaller clothes yet, don't know why. I think I am afraid that if I try on smaller clothes and they don't fit I will be depressed. It does look funny though to see my size 4X clothes on me. I look like a little kid playing dress up in her mom's clothes!

I feel so much healthier but one of the best benefits of my surgery is that my kids are now eating healthier because there is no more junk food in the house! My 16 year old has taken up walking for exercise and my 12 year old who had gained weight is now losing it, my 18 year old son has really thinned out and well my 7 year old takes after her dad and is a skinny minnie! My kids were never fat but they had gained weight in the last year and I didn't want to see them go down the same road I did. I was skinny as a kid, always active and into sports. Once I had kids though my eating habits got really bad and fast food was just too easy when I was busy and on the go. To see my kids already into bad habits scared me but now they are learning to be healthy again. When they were younger I always made sure they had veggies (they were rare kids who loved veggies lol) and fruit. Now we have all those healthy things in the house again and instead of reaching for junk they have fruit or some other healthy snack.

My bf keeps complimenting me left and right which I love lol. He tells me how small I am now (I am still 60 lbs heavier than when we met!) and how he can get his arms around me so much easier. He loved me at my heaviest and when I told him I wanted the surgery he said he didn't want me to, because of the risks, but he wanted me to feel better and be healthier so he was behind me all the way.

I just have to say that having others support you in your weight loss goes a very long way towards helping you be successful. The more I feel supported the better I am doing. It is still hard some days and I want to give in to some temptation but I've done pretty good. I got a kick in the ass the other day when I tried a sip of Sprite lol, man ,my tummy burned for 5 minutes just from one sip, won't do that again! Other than little slips like that I just try to get in protein and fluids lol.

So, I think it's been about 7 weeks since surgery and to have gotten to my first big goal is just so encouraging! My surgeon wants me to lose a total of 80 lbs by my next appointment in November, which worries me lol. I don't know if I can attain that but maybe if I up my activity, I must admit I lack seriously in that. I have a little over a month to lose 30 more pounds by my next appointment lol.

Anyways, I'm so glad to have a lot of support and to hear compliments keeps me going. I wouldn't be so successful without the support I have!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

6 Weeks Post Op

So, it's been 6 weeks already since my weight loss surgery. It doesn't seem like that long but sometimes it seems like forever. The times it seems like forever is when I am trying to eat something, take two bites and am full. I want to hurry up and get to the point where I can eat normal or somewhat normal again.

I have lost 45 lbs so far and love the way I am looking and feeling! I've had a few small "wow" moments so far. The other day I went through a turnstile without getting stuck or having to turn sideways and go up on my toes to try and make it through! I actually went straight through it and had room to spare! I have room in the bathtub too when taking a bath lol. I used to almost wedge myself in. My clothes are all really getting loose on me also. Soon I will have to go shopping methinks ;)

Everyone is noticing my weight loss but not everyone seems to be happy for me. I've actually had a few others who have had the same surgery tell me they are jealous of how well I am doing and I make them feel like about taking the wind out of my sails! I've also had others who I've known a long time stop talking to me. Jealousy is an ugly thing and I don't know why people can't just be happy for me. I didn't do this to myself just to look better than others. I did it to be healthy and to feel more confident, to boost my self esteem. More than anything though I missed being active!

Before surgery I would be huffing and puffing at the slightest movement, taking a few steps exhausted me! Now I feel so full of energy. I took 3 of my kids shopping at the mall the other day and walked and walked without getting tired or out of breath! It was amazing lol.

One concern I had resolved itself in this past week. I had been badly constipated since surgery. I know this is TMI but if you are having this problem or are considering the surgery you might need to hear this lol. I tried everything to relieve myself. I ate tons of fruit, took milk of magnesia several times (grossest stuff ever!) and walked to try and get things moving. Finally I went to the store and got some dulcolax which my surgeon recommended. You have to be careful after surgery which meds you ingest as some can now be very harmful. Anyways, I took 3 little dulcolax pills like the instructions said at 7pm. The box said to give it 12 hours to work so I figured I'd go by 7am before I had to get the kids off to school. body has no timetable it goes by lol. I did not go by morning, in body waited until 1 hour before I had to go to work at 4pm! It figures lol. I actually lost 2 lbs by the time I was done lol. Of course I had to go to work feeling very weak with my butt burning like it was on fire! Try to avoid getting constipated if at all possible! Walk, drink plenty of fluids to stay hydrated and don't let it go for long. I let it go way too long, almost 5 weeks! If you don't go for a week, you need to do something about it!!

I am still learning how to eat all over again. Some foods are just too heavy for me yet and I end up throwing them up. I really hate puking and try to avoid it at all costs but the pain is so bad I have no choice! I really hate taking my time eating also because my food gets too cold. I love my food piping hot! I chew and chew until my food is pulp but by then it tastes gross and the whole time I am chewing I have to really force myself not to swallow early, it's like swallowing is now involuntary lol. It sure is a learning process and I can't wait to be past this stage.

The problems I've had are so minor but frustrating all the same. Do I regret the surgery? No, I am healthy and love how I look and feel and know that in a few months I will be even better but at time I do wish I could order some fast food and chow down lol. Old habits die hard but they will die because this is a new me and I need to learn to be healthy again for me as well as my kids. I also want to be a good role model for them, it would kill me if in the future I was sitting in a waiting room while one of them had the same surgery as I've had. I wouldn't wish this on anyone and wish I had never let myself get to this point. I am so glad however that I had this option! I had run out of options and would not have lived a whole lot longer if not for this surgery, it saved my life!